Manners

Since I've been out of town, I haven't done a lot of cooking.  So, today I wanted to share something that we're focusing on in our house with our children! 
It seems that manners (table or otherwise) are a grey area in today's families.  As with anything else, consistency is key.  If we don't practice what we preach at home for mealtime, how can we expect different results at other homes or in restaurants or at school?  Although, we've taught our children and correct them on "Please", "Thank You", "May I Be Excused", "Yes Ma'am/Sir", etc... I'm always correcting them or asking them to "Remember their manners." 
In the present day Babylon in which we live, we are taught to worry about ourselves, our needs, our wants, our "fill in the blank".
Emily Post tells us that "Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others.  If you have that awareness, you have good manners--no matter what fork you use."
I do think it is important for us to know the proper formal uses for flatware, stemware, and china, although I wouldn't have said so 15 years ago.  I can honestly say that I never would have thought that I, the little girl from a tiny town, would ever have been dining with and/or entertaining dignitaries, people from other countries and cultures, or people with fame...but, it happens.  I was very happy on those occasions that Cathy Powell gave my husband and I the book "The Art of the Table" as an engagement present.  Her inscription said "One day you will be dining with presidents and kings."  So very sweet from one of the most gracious ladies I know.  And it is thoughtful gifts such as that that can make all the difference in helping someone feel comfortable in an uncomfortable social situation.  Also, in thinking of the feelings of others, some people are very easily embarassed and I would never want to embarass my host/hostess by not knowing what to do in a given situation.  So, I want to encourage everyone to try to educate yourself on "The Art of the Table".
But, getting back to Emily Post's point, one thing that can't be learned in a book, though, is graciously making those around us feel special and comfortable...whether through the meal we're cooking for them or the thanks we're giving. 
The challenge to my family is to follow through on the following no matter where we are for a meal:
1.  Thank God for the food we're eating.
2.  Thank the chef for the preparation of the meal (whether, Mom, Dad, friends, or at a restaurant)
3.  Thank the server (again, see above).
4.  Say excuse me or may I be excused (for children) if a need arises to leave the table
5.  At least try a bite of everything on the table
6.  If you do not like what is being served do not ask for something else or complain.
7.  Contribute or at the very least OFFER to contribute to a meal by bringing a dish or helping with the preparation or clean up.
8.  Never talk about the cost of a meal at the table or in front of your guests/host.
9.  Even out of the company of your host, do not talk about the meal or company being unsatisfactory.  If someone is kind enough to invite you to a meal, part of being gracious is knowing when to hold your tongue.
10.  Reciprocate!  Above all, remember that a beautiful meal (or even a not-so-beautiful meal) is a labor of love and takes time to prepare or takes extensive resources to cater or treat to a restaurant meal.  So, do not expect to continually be included if you do not reciprocate. 

Jack is starting kindergarten in a week and I hope the in hope reminders for manners will serve him well at school. 

After a week of being out of town, I am looking forward to being in my own kitchen, again, and cooking for my favorite people.    I'll catch you up tomorrow...I have no idea what's for dinner!

Until then, beautiful blessings from the Eastern Shore!